with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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