I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I touched a dick in church today
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