Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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