I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
