Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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