It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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