i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
