He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize