If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
