what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Randomize
