if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
