I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Michael Bay diarrhea
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize