So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
It's just like the Real World with babies
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
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like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
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So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.