Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
