Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
