your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
