Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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