oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
