How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
