Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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