we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
