Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Welp...herpes.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
