She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
