you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I think people are normalizing furries
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
