I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
