He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
