whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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