Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Im part way to drunk.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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