I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Randomize
