how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
