Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
