I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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