I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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