Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
