I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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