A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
