im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize