Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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