Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Randomize
