I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
