Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
