Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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