good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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