CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize