And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
