Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
