Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
