I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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