i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
