look no pants
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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